Catching up Part deux

So the week of Rowan's due date was pretty eventful. The next day ended up being CD1 & some friends from NJ came down to visit. It was awesome of them to come down. They wanted to be here with us over the EDD & my birthday was coming up. That Friday, my birthday, I got up early & went in for CD3 monitoring. After the last failed Femara cycle, I had gone to visit Dr T with the numbers from the Clomid cycle. He had agreed that cycle looked pretty ideal & wanted to revisit Clomid. So, once monitoring looked good, I was off to get a script to start Clomid that night.

I went back for monitoring a week later & things looked ready to go, so we scheduled my IUI for the next morning (Saturday 9/27). Sean's numbers looked fantastic & the IUI went pretty well. Into the 2WW we went. The following Wednesday, I caved & tested early because of something S said. Lo & behold, there was a faint line. I was hesitant to call it because I hadn't tested out my trigger. I tested again the next day with a digital & FRER, "pregnant" & a much darker line. S was out of town, so I waited until he got home & told him. There were a lot of tears from both of us. We were happy, but scared shitless was definitely the overwhelming emotion.

Betas went well & first ultrasound w/ blood flow check was at 4w6d. There was nothing on the u/s, but doc wasn't worried. A week later we went in again & there was our squirt with a heartbeat! A week later I started bleeding heavily, but things looked good on the u/s. I was put on bed rest for a week & then that was lifted. For the next couple of weeks, bleeding continued off & on, but my scans remained positive & Squirt was growing perfectly.

I was discharged from the RE & started care with my new OBGYN, DR L, around week 10. I was instantly in love with this doctor. He wanted to do everything & anything possible to prevent another loss like Rowan's. So the plan was to stop vaginal progesterone at week 12, start baby asprin at that time (Pre-E preventative), around week 14 have a transvaginal cerclage placed, & start P17 injections at week 16. I met with a new MFM at 12w, he was on board with everything. But, problems were already starting. My cervix was shortened, but still above 3cm, & I was funneling slightly. I put myself on bed rest for the week & by my next appointment with DR L, my cervix had lengthened some & the funneling was not showing anymore. 2 days later, I went to the hospital for my TVC. That went well, Dr L placed the stitch as high as he could & then kept me overnight for observation. I went home the next day with only pelvic rest as my limitation. Pelvic rest according to my husband is basically bed rest, so I wasn't exactly up & doing tons of stuff.

2 days before my TVC, we had gotten the envelope with the sex of our little squirt. We took that over to Carter's & picked out a couple of outfits, then had the saleswoman look & wrap up the outfit that went with the surprise inside. Christmas morning, we opened that & found out that we were expecting a son, Carson Quinn.

As much as I hate to admit it, especially now, there was some initial disappointment. We both desperately wanted a little girl. That feeling passed quickly & we both began to really look forward to & plan for our son.

On 12/31, I went in for a follow up with Dr L & everything looked fantastic. My cervix had lengthened further & the stitch looked like it was healing nicely. We left feeling incredibly optimistic & finally allowing ourselves to feel excited. 

A picture of my little alien boy on New Year's Eve:

Little did we know....

Catching up (Part 1)

I can't believe how long it's been since I've posted. So much has happened over the last 9 months & my head is such a mess. I have no idea how coherent this post will be. I should probably break it into multiple posts.

Oy, where to start?

So, after the loss of Rowan we really didn't have much time to grieve. We had about a month to pack up our entire lives & move to Louisiana. We spent about a week crying our faces off & then bucked up & got shit done. During the move, we spent a night at doodmama's house. When I got there she gave me the most amazing gift from her & all the ladies of SAIF & IDOB. This necklace has become one of my most prized possessions. I never leave home without it on, I feel like I'm carrying Rowan with me everywhere.

After we got to the new house, we immediately turned our attention to getting back to TTC again. I met with my new RE, he ran a repeat loss panel & tested me for Asherman's; everything came back just fine. My first cycle with him was an unmedicated IUI which ended in a probable chemical pregnancy. I never had a chance to get a beta so I'll never know if that faint line I saw was all in my head or if it was really there. What I do know is the period that followed it was unlike anything I've ever experienced in my entire life. 

My RE wanted to start with Femara for me, so we tried that for 2 cycles. I responded poorly both times.  We decided to take a break over Rowan's due date. On her due date, we went downtown to the insectarium to see the butterflies. They were so pretty. It was definitely a nice way to spend that day. There was one that landed on S & stayed on him right up until we get ready to walk out. I can't say that I believe it was her, but it was pretty damn cool to have this little guy hang around our entire visit.